We seem to be running faster than time
Leaving every cloud behind
We don’t even want to stop for a second
We don’t want anyone to find.
Running from pain and the sorrows
We don’t want to face our fears
Stuck in a loop of insecurity and doubt
We don’t want them to see our tears.
Fighting the days without a shield
It’s a war we never chose to be in
We hope that the night saves us
And helps us forget our sins.
We run faster in a race with no end
Trying to outstrip the next thing ahead
We can’t be seen in this chaos
Fearing they might try to mend us instead.
We swear to never stop or slow down
The monsters get stronger every day
The loop is jinxed, oh believe me
Hope it breaks one day, we pray.
What happens when you decide to stop
When you think you’ve had enough
Does the road ahead become easier
Or the days start to get more rough.
What happens when you decide to leave
When all the doors are closed for you
Does a light faraway start to flicker
As you start to walk towards the new.
What happens when you decide to change
When everything you believed in is broken
Does the moon become your saviour
When you finally seem to have woken.
What happens when you decide to walk
Silently yet fiercely towards the better part
Does the road seem that tough now
When you move towards a better start.
What happens when you finally listen
To that voice screaming in your head
Does the light seem inviting now
When all the tears have been shed.
Sitting by the window, watching the birds fly
My thoughts are unfamiliar, they aren’t mine.
Sipping tea in my favorite black mug
I’m convincing myself that I’m fine.
When did these thoughts create their space
I was immune to the monsters in my head
They keep me tied with a chain now
My soul bleeds red.
Leave the nights, the days are worse
When getting out of bed becomes scary
The sun shines bright and the sky sparkles
And yet waking up leaves me weary.
Looking at the clock, passing each second
I wonder what it used to feel like before
When I was not fighting so hard within
When even a little felt so much more.
The person staring back in the mirror
I can’t recognize her, she’s not me.
Tired and devoid of all hope
I wonder if the good she can ever see.
You were a mess walking in the streets
A hundred thoughts and silent words
Twisting your fingers like everytime before
Hoping something might free the birds.
You go back to the time you started
The fall was so beautifully designed
The magic in her blue eyes captivated
All the nerves in your poetic mind.
How could something be so beautiful
You couldn’t fathom the depth of blow
What her smile did to your knees
Oh how her touch made you flow.
You wanted her presence all the time
Her energy filed your wicked heart
However, the growing distance everyday
Made your nerves tear apart.
She was there and then she wasn’t
You couldn’t understand her need
Why couldn’t she see your love
You were ready to beg and plead.
And she was just gone without a word
Leaving you deserted with your pain
You were a mess walking in the streets
All your cries were in vain.
Who knew what awaited me around the corner
I would have been prepared if I had a clue
Our eyes locked for a minute and then another
Inside, a whole army of butterflies flew.
Who knew about the power you had on me
How my soul found its mate within a second
Covered in sweat and hands still shivering
Would have looked like a mess to you, I reckon.
Who knew what you would mean to me in the coming years
No one could have guessed at that time
I felt betrayed by my tongue which had frozen
Making me lose the moment at its prime.
Who knew how your smile would paralyze my bones
Make me go weak on the knees forever
Spellbound by you beyond acceptance
I swore I would leave you never.
Who knew that what awaited me around that corner
Had been the prettiest face I ever saw
Could have been fate, destiny or just my luck
That day I was blessed with love, pure and raw.
She’s dancing to the tunes without care.
Her hair flipping with unbelievable joy.
Her hips sway, her body twirls.
Can’t take eyes off her, that boy.
She orders another rum and coke.
The music gets louder with every sip.
The boy moves closer to her.
His hands form a strong grip.
He sways her around the floor.
She swings where his hand leads.
Though drunk, she senses his touch.
That’s enough, she strongly pleads.
You want this honey, the boy says.
Look at what you wear and how you dance.
I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t you.
Begging me to take this chance.
She can’t understand her friend now.
Her body for him to tame.
The dark lights and loud music.
And every finger points to her in blame.
She tries to shout and scream for help.
But every sound is lost in the crowd.
She fights the boy with all her strength.
She won’t go down easy, she vowed.
NOTE: I wrote this poem to express what a girl experiences when she is molested or raped. She is blamed for everything for, her clothes, her hair and everything else. It must have been her fault, that’s what they say. Her cry for help is ignored and as lot of incidents have pointed, she may not be safe with her close ones. However, the fight will continue and hopefully this will change one day.
Someday she’s going to call you at two in the morning.
You will know in an instant that she is drunk and high.
She’ll tell you how great you looked when you met before.
You will absorb her voice with a silent sigh.
She’ll tell you how much she missed your loving touch.
And how she still remembers every time you sneaked away.
She might start to recount all your escapades together.
But you, you’ll have no words to say.
She might ask you to meet her again for old time’s sake.
She will promise that she will, most honestly, behave.
She might even ask you to wear the perfume she loved.
And you’ll think of what all you gave.
She’ll tell you how she’s not drunk and wasted at all.
She’ll convince you how she means everything she says.
She might even bring up how much you loved her.
And you’ll wonder how it took her so many days.
And suddenly she’ll gasp and realize how you are no longer hers.
She’ll tell you how she feels she lost a part of her.
She might even ask you to reconsider your decisions.
And that might, for a moment, make you stir.
But remember love, when she calls you at two in the morning.
She’ll forget everything she says by the crack of dawn.
Her moment of weakness will only stay for an hour.
But if you fall, you’ll go back to being her pawn.